Andy Vermiglio wrote:ghostnoter,
This stuff is unfortunately very common. As much as possible, I would still try to be on good terms with everyone. "What goes around, comes around..." and all that.
I played a weekly gig in a good band at an upper scale jazz club. One night, there must have been 20 drummers in the audience who wanted to sit in. What are the chances of 20 drummers showing up to your gig and they all ask to sit in? Well as you may have guessed, the guys in the band (my great friends) put out the word that they were looking for a new drummer. And all these guys were auditioning for my spot. Of course my bandmates never told me about their plan. We had rehearsed about 4 nights a week for 5 weeks to get this gig. I charted out and learned 40 tunes. Needless to say, it was a not a great experience. I was replaced by a friend of mine. I kept on good terms with everyone. The band even asked me to come back and "sub" for my replacement. On one of these sub gigs, I overheard the "leader" tell some young lady, "Doesn't the band sound better tonight? It's because our old drummer is playing the gig!" I just shook my head and walked away.
Years before this, I was with a band that was just offered a recording contract, a tour across the states and a tour across England. We had worked really hard for this. Tons of rehearsals. The "leader" of that band called me out of the blue and said I was fired. This really took me by surprise. They brought in their former drummer (another friend of mine). Two weeks latter the band broke up. I received a call about a year later saying that the band was reforming without the former "leader" and they asked if I would be interested in joining them. I said "sure" and we met for a rehearsal. While I was setting up, the guys in the band started talking about the time I quit the band. I said, "What, I didn't quit, I was fired." They said that not what the former "leader" said.
Weird personality things happen in bands, it can be due to great egos coupled with great insecurity. If what you bring to the table is no longer valued, it's a good sign that it's time to move on...and what follows can be a really nice improvement in your situation.
All the best,
Andy
I'm guessing that some of this has to do with pre-existing relationships with lesser musicians. Sometimes who you know is more influencial than what you can do.